How would you feel if you crave closeness but your partner tells you they need more space? This may sound ominous but it’s not necessarily a sign of problems. More likely, you have some attachment style differences to navigate. You see, there’s a whole lot more to relationships than love at first sight and happily ever after. No one writes fairy tales about attachment issues but they should. It would save a lot of us a whole lot of stress. 

“Nits” are lice eggs. They are tiny tiny things, and people have to squint to see them. So being nit-picky is picking on small things about a person or their behavior that may seem unreasonable. So what is it psychologically, though?

Criticism

Developing emotional intimacy with your partner is a skill that can be learned. You will, however, be required to up your game when it comes to attributes like empathy, trust, vulnerability, and communication. The results and rewards are well worth the effort. 

If an imbalance of power exists — even when you don’t consciously acknowledge it — you are at risk of resentment and conflict. These differentials can be virtually invisible dynamics. They can also be shaped by societal norms. Either way, they really need a closer look and a better understanding. 

At the same time, opportunities often emerge out of a crisis. For some couples, it was a time to deepen their bond in the name of surviving the chaos. So yes, the pandemic has most definitely affected marriages. But that impact is as varied and diverse as the people in those marriages themselves. 

They may need constant reassurance, be very controlling, or behave in a manner that is over-sensitive. Perhaps worst of all, you get a sense that they don’t trust you. You didn’t ask for it but the onus is mostly on you to bring this topic to the forefront. Obviously, such a conversation must happen face-to-face. But what else can you do to make the discussion productive and helpful? 

Sure, it might sound New Agey but it also has tangible value in the material world. Whether we are in touch with it or not, we all experience challenges during childhood. More than two-thirds of children experience at least one trauma before they turn 16. These experiences very much influence how we think and behave as adults.

Of course, there is no single trait that automatically trumps the rest. But being on the same mental wavelength can feel magical. It contributes to healthy communication. You have such wonderful conversations. And you’re able to be comfortable with silence when it feels right for both of you. 

Communication is a key element of any relationship. But what happens when your partner appears to actively avoid such interactions? This is not only frustrating. It can leave you feeling neglected and even abandoned. However, if your partner has an avoidant attachment style, this dynamic is not unusual.

Like all emotions, jealousy is normal and basically inevitable in small doses. If handled productively, jealousy can lead to positive outcomes for you and your partner. However, far more often, jealousy is rooted in past issues and can cause a wide range of issues. This is why it is so critical that couples talk openly and honestly about their feelings.

ometimes it’s really hard to be in relationship and ask for what you need. At times, it’s easier to be ambiguous and not really ask because it means not really risking anything. It means never being rejected.

But there’s a real cost to that. It means that it’s more likely that your request never gets seen as a request.

That steady work can be summed up as “participation.” You may have heard about the importance of listening and not fixing things. But here’s another, equally difficult thing to do: stand up to your partner with love. This means that when things aren’t right for you, you say something. It means when you want to order Thai food and not pizza, you say it. It means when you feel there’s been unfairness and you need something different, you say it. While remembering that this is a person you love.

To some degree, every couple will have one partner who is more reliable. This dynamic can grow to a point where both partners harbor deep resentment. But here’s the biggest problem with parenting your parter: they end up assuming the role of the child and children don’t get married.

As with most carved-in-stone truisms, “never go to bed angry” is not a one-size-fits-all credo. When pondering this concept, it makes the most sense to examine why it may work in some instances while making things worse at other times. 

Relationships are a lot of work. Part of that work is staying in tune with where the work needs to be done. After the honeymoon phase, it’s dangerously easy to slip into routines and rhythms. In such a state, you can take each other for granted. The little gestures no longer seem necessary. In turn, the bigger gestures fall down the list of priorities. 

This is a time to communicate your needs before things get dicey. It’s important to start he process when it’s calm for the same reason people prepare an evacuation plan before there’s a fire. When you’re both calm, the conversation is more likely to be constructive. If you have concerns and anxieties about a holiday gathering, do not keep them to yourself.

People who are from different cultures may not understand the nuances of being from your culture. This goes double for people who are from the “dominant” culture. Everything from how you adapt your food to the local vegetable market to how turkey AND noodle dishes are served in Thanksgiving.

In your relationship, the words,“We need to talk” can provoke anxiety. Yet, they are vital to every relationship. Pushing down feelings and brushing aside uncomfortable thoughts are almost a Minnesota tradition. But doing so can build resentment and leave you feeling disconnected and alone. So taking relationship dealbreakers head-on is essential to relationship health.

When traveling with your partner, it can be quite a blend of fun and friction. Let’s consider a recent study. It found that 17 percent of romantic partners cut short vacations due to the fights they were having. One in five couples reported breaking up right after a stressful getaway. It’s not exactly what those travel ads promise, huh?